my wife said that all men with neat fingernails are jerks (I chew mine to the nub)- hmm can this be true?
she also finds my back hair unattractive, but I find the idea of shaving/waxing to be demeaning. I like that I don't fuss with my appearance, no product, no combs, no pedicures. If I shave more then twice a week, I get nasty ingrown hairs, so i pick up a razor as little as possible.
I want my wife to be happy - so we have a relatively egalitarian split of chores, I vacuum, mow the lawn, take out the trash, cook, and tend to the garden. She cleans the bathroom, washes dishes more then me, and is constantly 'neatening up' to the point that I'm driven crazy cause something i was just using has been moved or put away before I'm done.
My wife is older then me by three years and has a phd versus my masters- I love the idea that she's smarter then me (and she thinks I'm smarter).
Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy.
It's divine to own a dick,
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest prick.
So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas.
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake,
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend,
Your Percy, or your cock.
You can wrap it up in ribbons.
You can slip it in your sock,
But don't take it out in public,
Or they will stick you in the dock,
And you won't come back.
Over a period of seven years, I dated two photographers, each for a little over three years. I'm a guy, they are gals.
When I broke up with the last one and was ready to date again, I saw a few women. I decided that I would only date women with short fingernails. You know how in old-school China, women binding their feet was a sign that they didn't have to do any physical work? Well, I wanted the opposite. I can't stand fussy, primped-out women. I wanted a woman who wasn't afraid to get her hands dirty in the garden, or fixing something around the house, or doing dirty craft projects like silk-screening, etc. I'm a very DIY person, and I wanted somebody similar.
So I excluded women with long fingernails. Which was hard because there was this one gymnast girl with long nails, but that's another story...
In the end, I've found my short-fingernailed ladyfriend. Two winters ago she learned how to clean carburetors, and it's been love ever since!
Now what does this have to do with guys? Well, just as we guys have criteria for what we want in a partner, so do women. Some women like non-threatening metrosexual men, while others prefer the dirtbag with the beer gut, and I think that's just awesome. I live my life the best I can, and although there probably always will be questions about my place in the cosmos, I know that there's a place, as there is for every type of man and woman and everything in between.
i like to state that holding a door for ladies are not everything about manhood. but since we are having discussions about holding doors.
so i go in. i hold the exterior doors for a lady. so she goes in first. and she holds the vestibule doors for me. and i feel awkard.
(and it kinda evens out...)
do anyone of you run as soon as she goes in, and hold the vestibule doors for her?
as architects, i believe that we have power to change this.
let's have 3 sets of door (exterior door, outer vestibule door, inner vestibule door) in buildings!!!
someone tried to speed pass me to open the next door but since i wasn't expecting i ended up tripping through that next door. as a chick i guess i'm suppose to slow my pace and let you open every door for me?
and the man who was too slow to open the second door imediately bought himself a larger car, set of golf clubs and a kilo of beef jerky to compensate. real men dont eat soft food dammit.
I find it interesting on this thread that the majority of signs about how to operate as a man come down to how one treats women. Perhaps this is the problem - if a man is continually adjusting their behaviour to elicit a positive response from women, you are sure to be let down and confused - not because women are notoriously hard to please, but because you are placing the judgement of your behaviour onto someone else.
i cry sometimes when the right song plays on my walk home. its not masculine to admit this even though its probably one of the most important things i do all day
Jul 24, 07 7:33 pm ·
·
"Now skipping millions of years on the evolutionary scale, I see this soft/hard duality as the beginning of two sexes as well. Contrary to common perceptions, it is the female that is hard and the male that is soft. In simple undeniable terms it is woman that enables embryonic development within her own body--women's bodies themselves are protective shells (only women corporeally possess and facilitate the human egg that in turn allows fetal development). Men, on the other hand, very much do not have a "built-in" protectiveness, hence men make great displays about forever being on the defensive, and indeed it is almost exclusively men that have continually created our planet's foremost industry, if only to create that protective shell that their sex was not born with--the age old military apparatus (shields, armor, war ships, submarines, tanks, stealth bombers, etc. are all "man"-made protective shells)."
Ah ha, so it is, but you left out the even more interesting paragraph that follows:
"So what then is architecture? Is it a hard, 'simple', 'natural' protective shell that engenders the continuation of life? Or is it a soft formlessness forever redesigning an applied shell it doesn't naturally have?"
8 different facial cleansers with moisturors (duh!)
5 different shampoos (i barely have hair)
4 different body washes
3 different deodorants
2 different toothpastes
2 toothbrushes
these are all on active use
and I'm not sure this makes me any less of a man, and yes I do consider myself metrosexual simply because I tire from responding to questions if I am gay
I do open the doors for women, older people, children and the person I've with that moment - I was just raised that way. I also tend to order last when I go out to eat. And I look at people when i speak with them not always in their eyes, because some find it uncomfortable, but usually at their lips. Its not chivalry its just a means to place others before you.
I do the same thing when I speak to people, but I am often chided for it. I am trustworthy. I have no confidence issues. I am not hiding anything. Just like you said, its just a means to place others before you. I hate staring people in the eyes when we talk. I feel like we're staring each other down.
I only eat fish (on occassion a steak); I have chest hair and an odd one that pops up on my back; I always have a five o'clock shadow and a goatee; I don't like hair on my head - does any of this have to do with me being a man? I don't like wearing sneakers; or wingtips; I like flip flops; going naked is natural; I own over 20 pairs of shoes seperate from the 10 pairs of flip flops; I used to swim a 45 at the 25m; I like to hike; I can peel an orange with my bare hands; I can open a bottle with a knife; a spoon; another bottle; my ring; I wear a ring - the English guys thought it was a tad pooffy; i love to dance (shaking my hips and all); I know how to fire a rifle; been hunting for game birds; and wild pigs; I can debowel an animal; don't like it but i can do it; as well as gut a fish; I like to fish esp in the open seas; I can drink a whole beer in one go; pints or a full litre; I have gay friends; lesbian friends, bisexual too; I love them all; I also have homophobic friends - that i remind are actually hypocrites; I hug people; sometimes moments after i meet them; I've cried; over movies - romantic comedies mostly; I love action flicks; I'm a demi god in counterstrike; I think most guns should be illegal; I own two knifes; ones permanently stuck in the wall of my parents house....
none of this I think has a bearing of if I am a man or woman in today society and that suits me just fine
I'm a girly man....cause my wife reminds me about once a week
that a Brazilian Man....just loves his wife so much. and damn I have to be better than any guy from Brazil cause I had her move half way around the world for me.....or then again was it for her...actually were still madly in Love with one another after seven years.
both parents are university educated, as am I am my sisters. Dad likes to get pedicures and wear silk suits - at one point he owned over 60. I like pedicures but think suits are for funerals and some weddings - argument done! My mother isn't a clean freak - my dad is; I don't pick up the clothes off the floor until its time for laundry or well company is coming over. Now in my 30s I wash the dishes as soon as I'm done with them - not sure why. I have naturally neat nails - only had 2 manicures in my life and from watch "how I met your mother" yesterday - those are called jerk nails - I like pop culture but find the obession over it pointless
Having a son would frighten me, I think I have a grasp of what I would like my daughter to be - an opportunity to be self defined. And if i got it wrong there are enough strong women around me to fix that mistake. However with a son, I feel as if I should be his direct role model - and I'm not sure I'd be a comfortable with that. But perhaps I'm overthinking it - my son, will experience things before he decides if he likes it or not - instead of allowing social norms and mores to decide it for him and that to me is paramount. I guess writing it down - perhaps a son or daughter won't be raised any differently.
"Now skipping millions of years on the evolutionary scale, I see this soft/hard duality as the beginning of two sexes as well. Contrary to common perceptions, it is the female that is hard and the male that is soft. In simple undeniable terms it is woman that enables embryonic development within her own body--women's bodies themselves are protective shells (only women corporeally possess and facilitate the human egg that in turn allows fetal development). Men, on the other hand, very much do not have a "built-in" protectiveness, hence men make great displays about forever being on the defensive, and indeed it is almost exclusively men that have continually created our planet's foremost industry, if only to create that protective shell that their sex was not born with--the age old military apparatus (shields, armor, war ships, submarines, tanks, stealth bombers, etc. are all "man"-made protective shells)."
This quote reminds me of Children of Men.
Does war define men? I think from a historical context it has to be taken into account. Considering the relative peacefulness in the west since the end of WWII, maybe a lack of conflict explains our growing infantilization and "demasculinization"? I lay on the couch and play video games because i have no great conflict to fight, or I try to increasingly act feminine to suppress my innate drive to protect and kill? What happens when our traditional role as "protector" is no longer needed in a world without war?
I think before completely clogging this thread up with my omg drivel I need to say this.
I really love this thread, and its allowing me to express, question and put reason to many of the issues I have faced all my life - what it means to be a man in the world today.
"8 different facial cleansers with moisturors (duh!)
5 different shampoos (i barely have hair)
4 different body washes
3 different deodorants
2 different toothpastes
2 toothbrushes"
My personal stock is this:
1 bar of soap, which my girlfriend bought
1 bottle of shampoo, which the g/f bought
0 body washes (isn't that the same as soap?)
1 type of deodorant, but usually 2 or 3 sticks
1 tube of toothpaste
1 toothbrush
We're both men by anybody's standards. It's foolish to DEFINE masculinity by what personal products we use, but I'm sure many of, looking at the two lists above, would INFER or assume that one person is inherently more masculine than the other.
Which is to say, to prove my point, that my girlfriend's stockpile is exactly the same as mine, listed above, and she's most definitely a woman.
I think Apurimac means war on American soil. Considering that most (those without close relatives and friends in the war) now feel disconnected from wars, I do see his point.
IMO, being "manly" has nothing to do with how many personal grooming products you use. It has everything to do with whether you will respond honestly and without embarrassment when asked, even by another man, how many grooming products you use.
2 shampoo
1 conditioner
2 body washes
1 Dove bar soap for sensitive skin
1 face scrub - Cetaphil and baking soda
1 body lotion
1 moisturizer
1 toothbrush
1 flosser/pick/tongue scrub
1 electric razor
1 hair goop for humdity
3 cologne
1 deodorant spray
vado, i meant relative peacefulness. The deadlock between the US and the Soviet Union, and now the emergence of a global economic order, while creating unrest and havock in the developing world (worlds in which some american men have fought and died, nothing compared to pre-world war 2 levels), has brought about a kind of peace in the western, developed world that is unprecedented in Europe and even the U.S. When was the last time Europe, of all places went more that 60 years without major conflict? America is not exclusive to that either, (Mexican-American war, the Civil War, the War of 1812, the Revolution). Each subsequent generation from the WWII generation has faced lesser conflicits, my father had vietnam (which he didn't attend) and I have Iraq (which i am not attending). These aren't wars so much as "conflicts" when compared to the earlier wars of the 20th century.
there's nothing wrong with being metro. i appreciate the fact i dress nicer than a lot of guys i know. at the end of the day, i still have my girlfriend and that's all it boils down to.
"Moisturizer" is generally for your face/neck helpful because a lot of times facewash or hot shower water in general dries out the sensitive skin on your face. It keeps your face soft essentially.
thats funny diabase! oh and you can use preparation H on the bags under your eyes. its what actors use. i read it in a magazine while i was gettin my hair done.
men thread
agreed, family would just put a damper on my ludacris lifestyle
my wife said that all men with neat fingernails are jerks (I chew mine to the nub)- hmm can this be true?
she also finds my back hair unattractive, but I find the idea of shaving/waxing to be demeaning. I like that I don't fuss with my appearance, no product, no combs, no pedicures. If I shave more then twice a week, I get nasty ingrown hairs, so i pick up a razor as little as possible.
I want my wife to be happy - so we have a relatively egalitarian split of chores, I vacuum, mow the lawn, take out the trash, cook, and tend to the garden. She cleans the bathroom, washes dishes more then me, and is constantly 'neatening up' to the point that I'm driven crazy cause something i was just using has been moved or put away before I'm done.
My wife is older then me by three years and has a phd versus my masters- I love the idea that she's smarter then me (and she thinks I'm smarter).
listening to death from above 1979 is masculine
DBA is awesome.
I love how the women come to the same conclusion. Shows where our heads are at...
Anyway, it seems that it's far easier to define a man in the context of guys and boys, than it is to define a man by contrast to woman.
Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy.
It's divine to own a dick,
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest prick.
So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas.
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake,
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend,
Your Percy, or your cock.
You can wrap it up in ribbons.
You can slip it in your sock,
But don't take it out in public,
Or they will stick you in the dock,
And you won't come back.
Over a period of seven years, I dated two photographers, each for a little over three years. I'm a guy, they are gals.
When I broke up with the last one and was ready to date again, I saw a few women. I decided that I would only date women with short fingernails. You know how in old-school China, women binding their feet was a sign that they didn't have to do any physical work? Well, I wanted the opposite. I can't stand fussy, primped-out women. I wanted a woman who wasn't afraid to get her hands dirty in the garden, or fixing something around the house, or doing dirty craft projects like silk-screening, etc. I'm a very DIY person, and I wanted somebody similar.
So I excluded women with long fingernails. Which was hard because there was this one gymnast girl with long nails, but that's another story...
In the end, I've found my short-fingernailed ladyfriend. Two winters ago she learned how to clean carburetors, and it's been love ever since!
Now what does this have to do with guys? Well, just as we guys have criteria for what we want in a partner, so do women. Some women like non-threatening metrosexual men, while others prefer the dirtbag with the beer gut, and I think that's just awesome. I live my life the best I can, and although there probably always will be questions about my place in the cosmos, I know that there's a place, as there is for every type of man and woman and everything in between.
i like to state that holding a door for ladies are not everything about manhood. but since we are having discussions about holding doors.
so i go in. i hold the exterior doors for a lady. so she goes in first. and she holds the vestibule doors for me. and i feel awkard.
(and it kinda evens out...)
do anyone of you run as soon as she goes in, and hold the vestibule doors for her?
as architects, i believe that we have power to change this.
let's have 3 sets of door (exterior door, outer vestibule door, inner vestibule door) in buildings!!!
Only an architect could/would think of something like that. Amazing!
someone tried to speed pass me to open the next door but since i wasn't expecting i ended up tripping through that next door. as a chick i guess i'm suppose to slow my pace and let you open every door for me?
yep.
and the man who was too slow to open the second door imediately bought himself a larger car, set of golf clubs and a kilo of beef jerky to compensate. real men dont eat soft food dammit.
I find it interesting on this thread that the majority of signs about how to operate as a man come down to how one treats women. Perhaps this is the problem - if a man is continually adjusting their behaviour to elicit a positive response from women, you are sure to be let down and confused - not because women are notoriously hard to please, but because you are placing the judgement of your behaviour onto someone else.
now THAT was thinking fitting for an architect. good critical attention to what's being said, diabase! and right on, too.
i cry sometimes when the right song plays on my walk home. its not masculine to admit this even though its probably one of the most important things i do all day
"Now skipping millions of years on the evolutionary scale, I see this soft/hard duality as the beginning of two sexes as well. Contrary to common perceptions, it is the female that is hard and the male that is soft. In simple undeniable terms it is woman that enables embryonic development within her own body--women's bodies themselves are protective shells (only women corporeally possess and facilitate the human egg that in turn allows fetal development). Men, on the other hand, very much do not have a "built-in" protectiveness, hence men make great displays about forever being on the defensive, and indeed it is almost exclusively men that have continually created our planet's foremost industry, if only to create that protective shell that their sex was not born with--the age old military apparatus (shields, armor, war ships, submarines, tanks, stealth bombers, etc. are all "man"-made protective shells)."
Aaaaah, nice one, architectural pan! Source? (I get the feeling it is one I should recognize.)
Here's one, from Gloria Steinem, coming to Starbuck's coffee cups soon:
Women's bodies are valued as ornaments.
Men's bodies are valued as instruments.
, pp. 147-8.
Ah ha, so it is, but you left out the even more interesting paragraph that follows:
"So what then is architecture? Is it a hard, 'simple', 'natural' protective shell that engenders the continuation of life? Or is it a soft formlessness forever redesigning an applied shell it doesn't naturally have?"
Architecture as hermaphrodite then?
I have in my bathroom presently are the following
8 different facial cleansers with moisturors (duh!)
5 different shampoos (i barely have hair)
4 different body washes
3 different deodorants
2 different toothpastes
2 toothbrushes
these are all on active use
and I'm not sure this makes me any less of a man, and yes I do consider myself metrosexual simply because I tire from responding to questions if I am gay
I do open the doors for women, older people, children and the person I've with that moment - I was just raised that way. I also tend to order last when I go out to eat. And I look at people when i speak with them not always in their eyes, because some find it uncomfortable, but usually at their lips. Its not chivalry its just a means to place others before you.
I do the same thing when I speak to people, but I am often chided for it. I am trustworthy. I have no confidence issues. I am not hiding anything. Just like you said, its just a means to place others before you. I hate staring people in the eyes when we talk. I feel like we're staring each other down.
I only eat fish (on occassion a steak); I have chest hair and an odd one that pops up on my back; I always have a five o'clock shadow and a goatee; I don't like hair on my head - does any of this have to do with me being a man? I don't like wearing sneakers; or wingtips; I like flip flops; going naked is natural; I own over 20 pairs of shoes seperate from the 10 pairs of flip flops; I used to swim a 45 at the 25m; I like to hike; I can peel an orange with my bare hands; I can open a bottle with a knife; a spoon; another bottle; my ring; I wear a ring - the English guys thought it was a tad pooffy; i love to dance (shaking my hips and all); I know how to fire a rifle; been hunting for game birds; and wild pigs; I can debowel an animal; don't like it but i can do it; as well as gut a fish; I like to fish esp in the open seas; I can drink a whole beer in one go; pints or a full litre; I have gay friends; lesbian friends, bisexual too; I love them all; I also have homophobic friends - that i remind are actually hypocrites; I hug people; sometimes moments after i meet them; I've cried; over movies - romantic comedies mostly; I love action flicks; I'm a demi god in counterstrike; I think most guns should be illegal; I own two knifes; ones permanently stuck in the wall of my parents house....
none of this I think has a bearing of if I am a man or woman in today society and that suits me just fine
I'm a girly man....cause my wife reminds me about once a week
that a Brazilian Man....just loves his wife so much. and damn I have to be better than any guy from Brazil cause I had her move half way around the world for me.....or then again was it for her...actually were still madly in Love with one another after seven years.
I was raised in a progressive family i guess
both parents are university educated, as am I am my sisters. Dad likes to get pedicures and wear silk suits - at one point he owned over 60. I like pedicures but think suits are for funerals and some weddings - argument done! My mother isn't a clean freak - my dad is; I don't pick up the clothes off the floor until its time for laundry or well company is coming over. Now in my 30s I wash the dishes as soon as I'm done with them - not sure why. I have naturally neat nails - only had 2 manicures in my life and from watch "how I met your mother" yesterday - those are called jerk nails - I like pop culture but find the obession over it pointless
Having a son would frighten me, I think I have a grasp of what I would like my daughter to be - an opportunity to be self defined. And if i got it wrong there are enough strong women around me to fix that mistake. However with a son, I feel as if I should be his direct role model - and I'm not sure I'd be a comfortable with that. But perhaps I'm overthinking it - my son, will experience things before he decides if he likes it or not - instead of allowing social norms and mores to decide it for him and that to me is paramount. I guess writing it down - perhaps a son or daughter won't be raised any differently.
This quote reminds me of Children of Men.
Does war define men? I think from a historical context it has to be taken into account. Considering the relative peacefulness in the west since the end of WWII, maybe a lack of conflict explains our growing infantilization and "demasculinization"? I lay on the couch and play video games because i have no great conflict to fight, or I try to increasingly act feminine to suppress my innate drive to protect and kill? What happens when our traditional role as "protector" is no longer needed in a world without war?
I think before completely clogging this thread up with my omg drivel I need to say this.
I really love this thread, and its allowing me to express, question and put reason to many of the issues I have faced all my life - what it means to be a man in the world today.
As a counterpoint to architechnophilia, who has:
"8 different facial cleansers with moisturors (duh!)
5 different shampoos (i barely have hair)
4 different body washes
3 different deodorants
2 different toothpastes
2 toothbrushes"
My personal stock is this:
1 bar of soap, which my girlfriend bought
1 bottle of shampoo, which the g/f bought
0 body washes (isn't that the same as soap?)
1 type of deodorant, but usually 2 or 3 sticks
1 tube of toothpaste
1 toothbrush
We're both men by anybody's standards. It's foolish to DEFINE masculinity by what personal products we use, but I'm sure many of, looking at the two lists above, would INFER or assume that one person is inherently more masculine than the other.
Which is to say, to prove my point, that my girlfriend's stockpile is exactly the same as mine, listed above, and she's most definitely a woman.
peacefulness since wwII? korea, vietnam, panama, gulf war one and two. present occupation of iraq. where you been man?
wow...i thought I was bad with:
2 shampoo's
2 conditioners (I too have no hair)
2 body washes
2 face scrubs
1 face wash
2 moisturizers
eye cream
3 tooth brushes
wow...i've never listed all of my stuff before
vado, don't forget grenada, cuba and the falklands (I consider Britain part of the west)
you guys ARE out of control:
me:
1 shampoo
0 conditioners
0 body washes (but 1 ivory soap)
0 face scrubs
1 face wash
1 moisturizer
1 tooth brush
1 dental floss
1 manual razor (no shaving cream, use the face wash)
2 shampoo's
2 conditioners (I too have no hair)
2 body washes
2 face scrubs
1 face wash
2 moisturizers
eye cream
3 tooth brushes
if only other sustainabilities were so easily bought.
what exactly is a "moisturizer"?
I think Apurimac means war on American soil. Considering that most (those without close relatives and friends in the war) now feel disconnected from wars, I do see his point.
IMO, being "manly" has nothing to do with how many personal grooming products you use. It has everything to do with whether you will respond honestly and without embarrassment when asked, even by another man, how many grooming products you use.
woo hoo!
"It doesn't matter whether I am man or woman, because I am what I buy and the subsequent trash I discard."
1 shampoo
0 conditioners
0 body washes
1 dial soap
0 face scrubs
0 face wash
0 moisturizer
1 tooth brush
1 flossing stick
1 manual razor
1 shaving brush
2 shaving cream (one is almost empty)
1 aftershave skin conditioner
1 pre-shave oil
1 razor
2 shampoo
1 conditioner
2 body washes
1 Dove bar soap for sensitive skin
1 face scrub - Cetaphil and baking soda
1 body lotion
1 moisturizer
1 toothbrush
1 flosser/pick/tongue scrub
1 electric razor
1 hair goop for humdity
3 cologne
1 deodorant spray
1 meat
2 veg
i've seen what you guys look like. the beauty products are not working.
well, a girl has to try, right?
vado, i meant relative peacefulness. The deadlock between the US and the Soviet Union, and now the emergence of a global economic order, while creating unrest and havock in the developing world (worlds in which some american men have fought and died, nothing compared to pre-world war 2 levels), has brought about a kind of peace in the western, developed world that is unprecedented in Europe and even the U.S. When was the last time Europe, of all places went more that 60 years without major conflict? America is not exclusive to that either, (Mexican-American war, the Civil War, the War of 1812, the Revolution). Each subsequent generation from the WWII generation has faced lesser conflicits, my father had vietnam (which he didn't attend) and I have Iraq (which i am not attending). These aren't wars so much as "conflicts" when compared to the earlier wars of the 20th century.
Some of you guys here should seriously consider switching to interior design...
there's nothing wrong with being metro. i appreciate the fact i dress nicer than a lot of guys i know. at the end of the day, i still have my girlfriend and that's all it boils down to.
"what exactly is a "moisturizer"?"
this made me smirk
"Moisturizer" is generally for your face/neck helpful because a lot of times facewash or hot shower water in general dries out the sensitive skin on your face. It keeps your face soft essentially.
i just put my Burt's Bees lemon butter cuticle cream on
thats funny diabase! oh and you can use preparation H on the bags under your eyes. its what actors use. i read it in a magazine while i was gettin my hair done.
here i go,
turn the page.
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